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  1. #1
    Tour Winner JohnnyDee's Avatar
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    Feb 2015
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    Berkshire
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    3,171

    Golfing "Bon mots"

    Has anyone a particular favourite or heard a new one? Please try and keep it to one per post to widen the net.

    One I heard recently which did give me a chuckle was when I asked a member in the car park how he played.

    "I had more hits than The Beatles out there!" he replied.


    It might be old but I'd never heard it before
    I used to have a signature until it became unfashionable.

  2. #2
    Ryder Cup Winner fundy's Avatar
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    Aug 2010
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    Milton Keynes, Bucks
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    13,480

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    An Arsene Wenger, every saw where it went but you!
    In the bag:
    TM M1 9.5 degree
    TM M1 17 degree hybrid
    Orka RS1/RS3 Irons 3-PW
    Orka RS10 Wedges 52,56,60
    Ping Ketsch

    Handicap: 7

  3. #3
    Tour Winner upsidedown's Avatar
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    Apr 2008
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    Shropshire
    Posts
    4,003

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    In Matchplay " That's within the circle of friendship "
    Handicap : 5.2

  4. #4
    Money List Winner paddyk's Avatar
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    Jul 2011
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    6,844

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    please no.

  5. #5
    Challenge Tour Pro Jates12's Avatar
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    Sep 2015
    Location
    Sandbach, Cheshire
    Posts
    666

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    "Is that a dead sheep?" when you leave a putt short and its Still Ewe
    In The Bag & Club:
    • Driver - Titleist 913D2 9.5° - Diamana 62 S+ Blue
    • Fairway Wood - Cobra King F7 15.5° Draw Bias - Fujikura Pro 65S
    • Hybrid - Titleist 816H1 19° - Diamana S+ 70 Silver
    • Irons - Titleist AP2 716 4 - PW - Dynamic Gold XP 115 S300 - Std Length, 1° Upright
    • Wedges - Cleveland RTX-3 50°, 54° & 58° all V-MG
    • Putter - Ping Cadence TR Anser 2
    • Balls - Vice Pro+
    • HCP 2017 - 12.4 > 12.0 > 11.4 > 11.6
    • Sandbach Golf Club
    • www.sandbachgolfclub.co.uk

  6. #6
    Assistant Pro Lazkir's Avatar
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    Mar 2016
    Posts
    243

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    After hitting a ball into deep rough... 'don't bother looking for that, you could wrap it in bacon and even Lassie wouldn't find it!'
    Handicap 13.4 Ping G20 Driver MD 3 & 5 Woods Ping G20 Hybrid Ping G20 Irons 5 - U Cleveland RTX Cav 60 degree Wedge Odyssey Works Wide Versa Putter

  7. #7
    Club Champion Canary Kid's Avatar
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    Jun 2017
    Location
    West Sussex
    Posts
    69

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    A "Sally Gunnell" ... a shot that's not very pretty, but it runs and runs.

  8. #8
    Hall of Famer HomerJSimpson's Avatar
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    Aug 2007
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    Bracknell - Berkshire
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    60,496

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    Feed the fish as the white orb sails effortlessly into the lake/pond

  9. #9
    Major Champion Foxholer's Avatar
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    Nov 2011
    Location
    Wasting away again in Margaritaville
    Posts
    18,093

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    Quote Originally Posted by Canary Kid View Post
    A "Sally Gunnell" ... a shot that's not very pretty, but it runs and runs.
    The rather more tasteful alternative to this (or the Liz McColgan/Sonia O'Sullivan for other areas of UK) somewhat derogatory/unkind comment is.....

    'The Son-in-Law' - Not quite what you had in mind!
    Adams Speedline 9.5* Tech Rul 54 S
    Adams XTD TI 15* set to 13.5* Matrix Red Tie 70R
    Adams XTD TI 15* set to 16.5* Matrix Red Tie 70S
    Adams XTD TI 20* at 21* Matrix Red Tie S
    Adams XTD TI 23* at 24* Matrix Red Tie S
    Titleist 913 27* Diamana Kuro Kage S
    McGregor PCB Tour 6-PW S300
    Cleveland 588 Forged 52, 58
    Seemore Si1 33" or Bettinardi Baby Bee CS 33"

    Ia Ora Te Natura
    E Mea Arofa Teie Ao Nei

  10. #10
    Tour Winner JohnnyDee's Avatar
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    Feb 2015
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    Berkshire
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    3,171

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    I have a friend who uses one that I fear would invite an immediate lifetime ban from the Forum and could only be repeated at a meet.

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