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  1. #1
    Tour Winner JohnnyDee's Avatar
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    Feb 2015
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    Berkshire
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    3,020

    Golfing "Bon mots"

    Has anyone a particular favourite or heard a new one? Please try and keep it to one per post to widen the net.

    One I heard recently which did give me a chuckle was when I asked a member in the car park how he played.

    "I had more hits than The Beatles out there!" he replied.


    It might be old but I'd never heard it before
    I used to have a signature until it became unfashionable.

  2. #2
    Ryder Cup Winner fundy's Avatar
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    Aug 2010
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    Milton Keynes, Bucks
    Posts
    12,561

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    An Arsene Wenger, every saw where it went but you!
    In the bag:
    TM M1 9.5 degree
    TM M1 17 degree hybrid
    Orka RS1/RS3 Irons 3-PW
    Orka RS10 Wedges 52,56,60
    Ping Ketsch

    Handicap: 7

  3. #3
    Tour Winner upsidedown's Avatar
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    Apr 2008
    Location
    Shropshire
    Posts
    3,857

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    In Matchplay " That's within the circle of friendship "
    Handicap : 5.8

  4. #4
    Money List Winner paddyk's Avatar
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    Jul 2011
    Posts
    6,198

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    please no.

  5. #5
    Head Pro Jates12's Avatar
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    Sep 2015
    Location
    Sandbach, Cheshire
    Posts
    369

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    "Is that a dead sheep?" when you leave a putt short and its Still Ewe
    In The Bag & Club:
    • Driver - Callaway XR 10.5 - Projext X 6.0
    • Fairway Wood - Cobra King F7 15.5 Draw Bias - Fujikura Pro 65S
    • Hybrid - Titleist 816H1 19 - Diamana S+ 70 Blue
    • Irons - Titleist AP2 716 4 - PW - Dynamic Gold XP 115 S300 - Std Length, 1 Upright
    • Wedges - Cleveland RTX-3 50,54 & 58 all V-MG
    • Putter - Ping Cadence TR Anser 2 Counterbalance
    • Balls - Vice Pro+
    • HCP - 12.0
    • Sandbach Golf Club
    • www.sandbachgolfclub.co.uk

  6. #6
    Assistant Pro Lazkir's Avatar
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    Mar 2016
    Posts
    143

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    After hitting a ball into deep rough... 'don't bother looking for that, you could wrap it in bacon and even Lassie wouldn't find it!'
    Handicap 12.6 Ping G20 Driver MD 3 & 5 Woods Ping G20 Hybrid Ping G20 Irons 5 - U Cleveland RTX Cav 60 degree Wedge Odyssey Works Wide Versa Putter

  7. #7
    Hacker
    Join Date
    Jun 2017
    Location
    West Sussex
    Posts
    18

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    A "Sally Gunnell" ... a shot that's not very pretty, but it runs and runs.

  8. #8
    Hall of Famer HomerJSimpson's Avatar
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    Aug 2007
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    Bracknell - Berkshire
    Posts
    58,142

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    Feed the fish as the white orb sails effortlessly into the lake/pond

  9. #9
    Major Champion Foxholer's Avatar
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    Nov 2011
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    Wasting away again in Margaritaville
    Posts
    17,624

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    Quote Originally Posted by Canary Kid View Post
    A "Sally Gunnell" ... a shot that's not very pretty, but it runs and runs.
    The rather more tasteful alternative to this (or the Liz McColgan/Sonia O'Sullivan for other areas of UK) somewhat derogatory/unkind comment is.....

    'The Son-in-Law' - Not quite what you had in mind!
    Adams Speedline Tech Rul 54 S
    Adams XTD TI 15 set to 13.5 Matrix Red Tie 70R
    Adams XTD TI 15 set to 16.5 Matrix Red Tie 70S
    Adams XTD TI 20 at 21 Matrix Red Tie S
    Adams XTD TI 23 at 24 Matrix Red Tie S
    McGregor PCB Tour 5-PW S300
    Cleveland 588 Forged 52, 58
    Seemore Si1 33" or Bettinardi Baby Bee CS 33"

    Breathe in. Breathe out. Move on!

  10. #10
    Tour Winner JohnnyDee's Avatar
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    Feb 2015
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    3,020

    Re: Golfing "Bon mots"

    I have a friend who uses one that I fear would invite an immediate lifetime ban from the Forum and could only be repeated at a meet.

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